Actual conversation with my 3.5 year old in the car on the way home from school today. (I should also add that our childcare provider is much more conservative than our own views, but it works for her):
E: Mommy, God died.
Me: (listening to fascinating talk radio story & newborn crying) What?
E: God died.
Me: (frantic thought searching) Uh. Um. Sort of. . .
E: He DID. Why did God die?
Me: (frantic thought searching) Well, some bad men killed him.
Me: (frantic thought searching) They just did, but then God only died for a little while and then came back. God didn't stay dead. (Ha! Problem solved.)
E: Why did he come back?
Me: (oh shit) Well. . . to show us that he loves us and that God is still here.
E: God is in the sky?
Me: (frantic thought searching) Sure. God is everywhere.
E: In the clouds.
Me: Sure. (Dodge & give non-commital answer.)
Me: Well, God is everywhere because God made the earth. (Sigh. That one was easy.)
Me: God just did. That's the way it is.
E: Oh. Okay.
Me: (Why didn't I go with this answer in the first place?)
I thought for sure that I had a few years on this one. . .