A Message to Clothing Buyers

Halloween is stressful.  I'm no good at costumes.  Costumes, telling jokes, remembering card games--my weaknesses.  I mean, there are others, but those are my learning disabilities.  I sent a text to Chris yesterday that said, "Our not watching tv [with kids] is great until Halloween and all the costumes are weird costumes or scary."

Elliott initially said he wanted to be a grasshopper, totally blaming it on the plague of grasshoppers at Glammy & Poppy's this summer.  All I could think was, a grasshopper?--because that's easy.  Then he said, he though maybe a cow would be good.  I felt good about this.  A cow.  I can do a cow.  That's not too hard, right?

Party City?  No cows.

Target?  COWS.  I knew it!  Only no.  The top size was a size 4.

You know the whole thing about limiting screen time for young kids?  Yeah.  There is no place that it is more apparent that the advice is not working than the Halloween costume aisle at any store.  Elliott is nearing 5 years old, which I can assume from the options means he either loves superheroes or would love to be a slightly less-scary monster/vampire than his 10-year old friends.

So costume developers, please take note:  there are still some sheltered four-year olds in the world.  My child has no idea who Superman, Batman, Spiderman, Captain America or the Incredible Hulk are.  No idea.  Super Mario Brothers?  Nope.  A vampire?  Nope.  Combine this with my commitment to avoid all items bearing a skull and the choices are SLIM.

My message to stores that provide clothing to children little boys (I'm not even touching on the issues with clothing for girls):

1.  A 5-year old is still a little boy.  Little.
2. Nearing 5 has not turned my child into a skate-boarding champ.  Really.  No skateboards.
3. Ninjas and vampires kill people.  Please refer back to #1--no killing machines here.
4. Superheroes are great, but I have to let you in on a secret--not all kids are aware of who they are. Elliott knows them by sight, but has no idea what they stand for or do.
5. I don't get the skull trend.  I don't.  I feel like I must not be alone in this, right?  I can't be the only one opposed to buying clothing items with skulls.  
6. There is plenty of childhood ahead of us, where we'll purchase the scary costumes.  I promise.  Maybe.  

THAT House.

Yes.  Another Halloween post.  The catch is that this time I'm worried that neighborhood might be in jeopardy.  As the title of my blog suggests, we live in a run of the mill, average middle class neighborhood.  I feel completely comfortable going door-to-door trick-or-treating. . . .

Until we got to that house.  Only I didn't know it was that house until it was too late and the confused hermit was staring at my perfectly adorable three year-old.  The picture--random angel water fountain next to the front door, but without accompanying landscape or color of any kind.  A small square area blocked off next to the door with a homemade cardboard sign sporting chicken scratch with "deliveries here."  (Only later would I be suspect of why someone wanted their packages hidden, when the front porch wasn't especially visible from the street anyway. I think that's where bomb-making equipment might be delivered.) Back to the moment.  We knocked because, after all, the porch light was on.  The wall(s) of DVDs actually caught my eye before the person answering the door commanded my attention.  Average-sized Asian male with athletic shorts.  Not crazy or suspicious when considered alone.  But the tucked-in Garfield t-shirt with the athletic shorts pulled half-way to his armpits was cause for concern.  Square glasses straight from my grandfather's bedside table. . . in 1986.  The candy was in a metal pot.  And then, then, I noticed that the entire living area visible from the front door was covered by computer and electronic equipment.  And did I mention there was no welcoming smile or even a "you're welcome" to my three-year old's thank you? Creeptastic.

I didn't suspect there was a crazy internet crime mastermind was in my very.own.neighborhood.  And that is how that house became that house.  Its own unintended Halloween spectacle.

It's Serious. Requisite Halloween Post

We've been counting down the days.  Not for a week, not for a month, for a YEAR.  Elliott has been in LOVE with Halloween since our last trick-or-treating expedition.  It was a success.  Until the tiny baby lost his sh*t.  Good timing because quickly after Elliott began plopping on the sidewalk saying, "I'm tired.  Carry me, Mommy."  And as soon as we got home, our fairy princess stated, "Nigh, nigh."

*We had a great time, despite all the serious-face pics.  

Glammy & Poppy came to trick-or-treat, too.

Beautiful fairy princess.

Serious tiger.  My whisker-drawing skills are limited.

Rawr.

It was a spectator sport for Brooklyn.  One of these days she will be convinced she can walk.

Obligatory Halloween Cuteness

Halloween was so much fun this year.  As soon as we said Halloween was coming up, Monkey yelled, "Canneeeeee!"  I think he has his dad's sweet tooth.  We squeezed in two Halloween celebrations--Trunk or Treat at a dear friend's church with part of our 'village' and then trick or treating with Glammy on Halloween.  Poppy had to stay home because of some questionable tummy feelings.  We had a great time, ate a (more than) sufficient amount of canneeeee!, Monkey got to hand-out cannneeee! and we made it to bed just a smidge later than normal.  Best news of all?  Little Bit slept all.night.  All. Night.  I awoke with a start at 6:30am disoriented and confused.  I  thought perhaps I had forgotten and had been up with her?  Nope.  Sleep.  Glorious sleep.

On to the cuteness:

 Daddy and the ladybug.

 First time in the big-kid stroller for trick or treating.

With our favorite Ninja Turtle.

The bravest, toughest Mr. T. I've ever seen.  True story.  

More candy please, says Mickey.

Hanging with the original bug lady, LJ.

 Not a fan of the ears.  No matter how mommy tried to bribe and cajole.

I am in love with this pic.  In.love.  For some reason the color version has a very strong blue tint.  Odd.  

One last shot before bed.  Mommy is practicing taking pics in manual mode.

All in all, Halloween 2011 was a success, despite Monkey declaring pumpkin stinky and refusing to scoop out innards.  Truth be told, I was taking one for the team and carving so he could have that rite of passage. . .turns out that our thoughts on the matter are the same.